Munirah

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

I hate, hate the word guilty.

its too long. that i cant rmb anymore how she talk or laugh or walk. i fear for the "guilty" that i might feel. i want to care or at least act like i care but it feel as if shes gone. shes just.. there.

and now, the doc says, theres no hope. just like last year, just like last last year. and we've always prepared ourselves, we've consoled each other that its better and then the cycle repeats once again, with more blaming, more mistrusts, more judging, just more of that.

i hope the cycle stop. and i feel guilty. i feel cruel. but its just too emotionally straining, let me see the good now.

i just need to let it go.